14 Jun 2010

You blink when you breath.

I weighted myself on friday for the first time in about 4 weeks, and i was 92lbs, i was gutted as this meanth my month was spent on nothing but gaining a lb and i had 12 more lbs to loose before i was 80lbs and allowed to go on the beach in a bikini and feel good about myself. I went away again this weekend, i stayed with my little lover, it was brilliant, i didnt each much, and he wasnt fond of this at all, he wants me to get better so our 'kids can be strong' but i wasnt hungry so i couldnt eat, i was just so happy to be with him, i spent my whole time holding on to him, we had a few fights, it makes us stronger each time though. He has trust issues and so do i, but i hold mine to myself, whereas he takes them out on me, questioning everything i do, about guys ive been with in the past, but its understandable that hes going to be like that after flying all the way over to australia as his ex rang up crying just to find out that she has been cheating on him, WHAT A COW, thats all i can say! But yeah, i weighted myself this morning, and i waws 89lbs, this made me happy, i havent been in the 80's for a long time, so i got an instant confidence boost, i now only have 9lbs until i get to 80lbs, that isnt far at all in my eyes, infact thats so close.

I cant do it, i will do it, i must do it, i live to do it. I wont get sick, im a crazy strong person and ive been sick so much in my life its just became normaly everyday life for me!




1 comment:

  1. do u think he knew that wen u got home u continued talking 2 guys online that u had spent months sending naked pics 2 & flirting with while they told u how they had an ana fetish & how sexy they found ur body? or do u think thats just something he stumbled on later that will without doubt now be added to the long list of lies & decete that will always weigh ur relationship down with scar tissue?!

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